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January 11
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"Hey, uh... I need to tell you something."

"Sure, what is it?"

"It's a secret. I've been keeping it to myself for such a long time, but I just need to tell someone, and you're a great friend, so I figured that I could trust you with this."

"Wow, really? Thanks! Okay, what's the secret?"

"Whoa, not so fast."

"...Huh?"

"First, you need to solemnly swear on anything and everything you hold dear that you will not, under any circumstances, tell anybody. And I mean ever."

"Wow, this must be pretty serious. Okay, I solemnly swear."

"Actually, now that I think about it, I'm gonna go write up a contract."

"Um, that's not really necessary."

"Yes it is. This is my hugest secret, and I need to be sure you won't tell anyone!"

"Yeah, but I already--"

"I'll be right back!"




"Okay, here's the contract!"

"You've been gone for, like, half an hour! Where have you been?!"

"I was writing the contract! Look, here it is!"

"...I'm looking at one five-sentence paragraph with a bunch of blank spots on a piece of looseleaf. How the hell did you manage to take thirty minutes with this?"

"I couldn't get the wording right, and I wanted it to be perfect!"

"Yeah, but-- Nevermind. Can we get through with this please?"

"Okay, make sure you read all the terms and conditions thoroughly."

"Of course, wouldn't dream of just skimming right through. ...Okay, done."

"There was no need to rush through it!"

"I'm a quick reader. Now can I please just sign the damn thing?"

"Of course. Sign here. Then there. Put your initials here. And then sign one more time, right there."

"Okay, I solemnly swore not to tell anyone and I signed your little contract--"

"Hey! That is a legally binding document!"

"--So, will you please tell me your secret now?"

"....."

"Come on. What is it?"

"I'm sorry, I can't tell you..."
:iconsourair:
Finally, some inspiration. (My account's not deactivated anymore! :dummy:) Hope you liked it! I'd love if you could leave a comment~ :meow:
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:icondemented287:
~Demented287 Jan 26, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Hahahaha freaking love it! :D
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:iconsourair:
~SourAir Jan 27, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks! I'm glad you do! :D
Reply
:icondemented287:
~Demented287 Jan 27, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
This is just... amazing. It's hilarious!
Reply
:iconsourair:
~SourAir Jan 27, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you!! :D
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:iconvioletflame1598:
Mood: Cheerful ~violetflame1598 Jan 15, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Made me smile!
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:iconsourair:
~SourAir Jan 16, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks, I'm glad you liked it! :)
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:iconbrimana:
~Brimana Jan 12, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Hahaha, that's funny XD Nice dialogue
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:iconsourair:
~SourAir Jan 12, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks! I'm glad you liked it. :)
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:iconbronzevalim:
oh after all that work and thirty minutes he/she ended up not telling anyway. it takes a lot to trust someone and those you can trust the most are your family.
Reply
:iconsourair:
~SourAir Jan 12, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Haha, I agree! I have a few close friends that I can tell my secrets to as well.
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